Woo Hoo!

Bangs, originally uploaded by laurensmashtoys.

Today I have a half day at work! It is always nice to sleep in until 8! I always love a free morning.

This week should be lovely. I didn't end up buying fabric yesterday cause I forgot my JoAnns coupon. If I have time this morning, I am going to run up there and get it! I can't wait to see how the dress turns out. I think I can work on it tonight. I want to make some toys tonight too!

I have been working on my zine the past few nights. It is coming along nicely! I am trying to have everything done by July 1st. July is my month, you know! My birthday is in 17 days! I love that. So much fun. I have never made one before. I have to think about what goes into it. I might not have it done by my deadline. But whatever. I have a few tiny drawings done too.

Yesterday I learned a hard lesson...

the garden center, originally uploaded by laurensmashtoys.

Gerber daisies, while lovely, are annuals which means at the end of the season. They. Die. and then they don't come back. How sad.

I got my alkaline trio tickets in the mail. Yay! My birthday will be fun I think. My friend Lisa and I are going. I can't wait!

Today is going to be fun, my brother and his fiance are coming up to make truffles and go to a movie with us! I am going to try and make the favors for their wedding if the truffles turn out good! Super fun.

I am also trying to get to the fabric store to get some fabric and a zipper for my dress. :D I love sewing.

I wish I had a picture, I made my little best friend a mermaid doll because she has a current slight obsession with mermaids. She was so cute dragging her around everywhere. She did tell me that she had been wanting her for her whole life or something to that effect. That totally makes my day. :D

Here is my Birthday dress.

Birthday Dress, originally uploaded by laurensmashtoys.

The one on the left with the green sash. I can't wait to make it!

hello...

girl, originally uploaded by laurensmashtoys.

I went to the fair finally, when it was open. It was fun with the kids. It did pour rain all over us and i was freezing, but it was still fun. I got some cute pictures and all. Too bad my camera ran out of batteries and is charging right now.

I have been drawing a ton lately. Not great stuff, but it is totally fun for me. My micron is dead, I have to go buy a couple more soon. I use them up for sure. I don't mind using ball point pens really though.

I need to get some new supplies and work on some new projects. You should see my bedroom right now though, its a hella mess. I have my drums, a bed, a sewing table, a dresser, tons and tons and tons of fabric and craft supplies. All over the place. Oh and my tons of clothes and no hangers. It makes me crazy being in there. Soon I will be out and on my own.

I have been sort of a flake lately, but I am feeling much more in control and that is good. I feel good about stuff right now, and I think I am moving forward which rules.

bobby pins are my pixie dust

bobby pins are my pixie dust, originally uploaded by laurensmashtoys.

I had a really fun day. I was expecting to share tons of fun pictures of the fair we were going to tonight, my friends and I. Too bad we are crazy people and the fair didn't start until tomorrow! and we even walked with the kids all the way there and found out that it was closed. It ended up being a super fun walk and then we went out for dinner! so it all ended well.

My favorite part of the evening was that when we got to the fair and saw it was closed, Jim told the kids that it was really an "unfair" and it was :D

I am super tired today, I think I am going to go to bed early and get a start on tomorrow.

I did however, score myself 2 tickets to the Alkaline Trio on my birthday which rules. I also found out that bobby pins are my pixie dust. :D

I require decorations for my beverages.

I require decorations for my beverages., originally uploaded by laurensmashtoys.

I had an exceptionally lovely weekend.

My good friend Chris bought a house with his girl, and he had a super nice party to celebrate. Of course, it was seven hundred degrees outside which made it difficult to breathe, but it was nice to spend time with friends. Luckily, he had plenty of things to put in my drink that were fun like giraffes and umbrellas. It made for a pretty fancy gingerale and grenadine. I also played cornhole for the first time and I now think it is definitely as lame as its name.

Now I'm back to work and loving the weather. It has a definite northern california feel to it. Hot sun but cool breeze. one of my favorite things!!

This week is nice, I am going to try super hard to meet my friends Tessa and Megan down in Columbus for a night, Maybe Friday if I can swing it! I am excited! I always love meeting my etsy friends :D

I also have my brother's gradubirthdaygagement party! He is 30, his fiance graduated Nursing school and they are engaged! It should be a fun time! Hopefully the weather stays nice out for it and we don't drown in thunderstorms or die of heat exhaustion. Hopefully there will be tiny plastic animals to put in my glass.

Today was a good day. and I like to take pictures of myself in cars...

Sitting with babies while they sleep is boring., originally uploaded by laurensmashtoys.

I *am* happy. so there.

I had fun today hanging out my best friend family for a million hours. They almost drove me over the edge. Well not really it was super fun to be around so many people! I only wish there was a

Missy and I also went crazy and ordered a bunch of appetizers for our dinner tonight and it was bad and good. :D Yum

I also didn't know there was a problem right now going on with Lemons! did you know? apparently they are the enemy right now. Friday's isn't even using them for a couple of days...

Oh! I saw this program on t.v. today that changed my perspective on things. There was a tiny physically handicapped lady with a pretty bad homelife, her mother had died, her father had alzheimers and her brother was mentally handicapped and he had violent outbursts. When her mother died, her family(son, husband and her) moved back in to take care of her dad and brother. She took a very hard situation and made the best of it. She wasn't selfish, she didn't act out or anything. She made the best out of things. I found it to be very inspiring and it made me think of things in a different way than ever before. I am going to try to be a better person. Still take care of myself but get my shit together too. I am trying so hard.

I am just a person though, I make mistakes, I am real, I try and fail. All sorts of things. I try to realize this in other people when I am in situations too. I just hope people can do that for me too when I don't do the right thing.

There was a time and a place that was all full of mistakes.

Sigh....., originally uploaded by laurensmashtoys.

And a face that was all full of shit.
I was frustrated and angry.
I was more than alive.
A catcher in the rye.
I was a jet plane, a thin membrane.
Washing and preening and shedding all hope.

Its been a hard week for me. For a bunch of reasons. I left someone I really care about after a visit I thought was going to go another way.

I feel like he talks to me in doublespeak there are words and then there are meaning. I am feeling let down, which is fitting cause I let him down.

I really feel like my heart is not whole right now. I am hoping that the future holds good things for me. I am positive that it will.

I just want to be happy with myself. And right now I am not happy! The only thing keeping me ok is sewing and hope.

I did get my first money saved in my bank account! That is good for me. It can only go upwards from here in the saving mode.

Im totally writing a zine

My Merman :D, originally uploaded by laurensmashtoys.

aren't you proud? Just a new little character to include. I am trying to write a little comic :D

I am excited I have some good ideas and some time to kill!

I am really loving mermaids right now.

I am working toward a goal and it is fun to make things fit for that. I am trying really hard. I like to try. I like to accomplish what i set out to do too.

Wish me lots of luck! You guys help me go on and on and on!

My Heart Floats In The Bay

love love love, originally uploaded by laurensmashtoys.

From Sour Home Chicago And Your Being Far Away
There's No Telling What I'll Do If I Don't Return To You..

Well, I'm back! My trip was lovely, I missed SF, it definitely feels like home to me. I was glad to be with Ryan and Baby!

We will see what the future holds for me, things definitely turned out differently than I expected that they would. I have some things to take care of for sure.